In the Arms of an Angel
by WilliamsLadyLove
Summary: Angel takes time to think about his life, his possibilities and begins to lose hope of ever achieving what he longs for the most, becoming human, but Cordelia is there to see him through it. Short song ficlet, slightly dark.


Disclaimer: I don't own this song, the talented Sarah McLachlan does and the brilliant Joss owns Angel  
  
Author's Notes: This is just a short little ficlet that I suddenly thought up out of the blue. I hope that you like it!  
  
As Angel sat down, his large dark frame, slipping into the large chair, he sighed, his thoughts weighing heavily on him, bearing down upon him like the waves that crashed along the California coast line. Everyone had since gone home or gone to bed and he was left alone with his thoughts. His thoughts and his waiting.   
  
Waiting as he always did, wondering when and if he would ever be granted a second chance. He had spent so much time, devoting his life to saving tortured souls that lined the city streets of Los Angeles. The prophecy said that he may one day be human, but when would that be? And would he be worthy to receive such a gift? He had been so horrid to those people as Angelus, and he had enjoyed it, reveled in it. And this soul had not been his choice, it had been forced upon him, would that matter when it came down to the gauntlet? It would, cause he would never be good enough, worthy enough to receive a second chance.  
  
And the memories, always the memories. His golden haired angel who he had left, leaving her shattered. She had moved on, but why couldn't he? His Buffy, his light, she needed her own light, not to be pulled into the dark. But the feel of her skin against his and the touch of her lips on his still lingered in his mind.   
  
spend all your time waiting  
  
for that second chance  
  
for a break that would make it okay  
  
there's always one reason  
  
to feel not good enough  
  
and it's hard at the end of the day  
  
I need some distraction  
  
oh beautiful release  
  
memory seeps from my veins  
  
let me be empty  
  
and weightless and maybe  
  
I'll find some peace tonight  
  
Cordelia walked through the halls of the hotel that Angel lived in. She hadn't gone home, she had been cleaning up when he has retired to his room. Curious as to what he was doing, what he was thinking about, she had quickly finished her work and then headed up towards his room. She could sense that something had been amiss about him lately. Perhaps he was getting discouraged, but whatever it was, she would talk to him about it.   
  
She opened the door of the room which Angel stayed in, and walked into the spacious apartment. The entire room was dark except for one small area, where the light was only very dim. There sat Angel, his head hung and in his hands. What surprised her the most were the sobs which she heard coming from the dark hero that she held in such high regard.   
  
Walking over to him, she pulled her hair out of her ponytail and slipped the band around her wrist. She could hear his sobs, with words mixed in with the tears. Buffy, not worthy, never, failure and beast she heard mostly from what she could make out. He was breaking down, losing all of her composure.   
  
Settling her hands on his shoulders she touched him very gently, and slid her hands down the sides of his arms, pulling his hands away. He looked up at her with large brown eyes and she gave him a gentle reassuring smile, and pressed a delicate, manicured finger to his lips as he began to speak. She shook her head and leaned down, her lips replacing her finger.  
  
She'd known for a long time that she loved this man, and she was gonna show him because tonight, seeing him so vulnerable made her love him even more than that she had originally thought her feelings could possibly run.   
  
in the arms of an angel  
  
fly away from here  
  
from this dark cold hotel room  
  
and the endlessness that you fear  
  
you are pulled from the wreckage  
  
of your silent reverie  
  
you're in the arms of the angel  
  
may you find some comfort there  
  
Angel thought that everyone had gone home, but when Cordelia entered his room and touched him so gently, so sweetly, he hadn't the heart to tell her that he wanted to be alone, cause the truth was, he really didn't. But when her cherry lips touched his cold ones, he felt his body come alive. This woman whom he had worked with for so long now never ceased to amaze him. And he loved her for it.   
  
She'd seen his darkness and he had seen hers. They were one in the same. The held each other's heads out of the blackness that threatened to pull them under day in and day out. His arms encirlced her waist and pulled her onto his lap, holding her close, needing her to drive away the darkness, the drive away the memory that he could never have again. He needed her just as badly as he needed blood to live.   
  
With this woman by his side he could make up for his life, his evil soulless life. With every vision came another chance to make good upon his life, and in hopes on day of gaining his life again, perhaps to share with this woman whom he now held so tightly in his arms, pursuing her lips so hungrily with his own.  
  
so tired of the straight line  
  
and everywhere you turn  
  
there's vultures and thieves at your back  
  
and the storm keeps on twisting  
  
you keep on building the lie  
  
that you make up for all that you lack  
  
it don't make no difference  
  
escaping one last time  
  
it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh  
  
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees  
  
Together, the two of them stayed like that, falling asleep, holding one another. And in their minds' eyes they were no longer in a cold hotel room or on this pursuit of something that may never come to pass, but they were in the arms of their very own angel, finding comfort amongst one another and ignoring the unceasing endlessness of it all. And in their sleep, both silently whispered, "angel..." and the word was lost on the still air of the night.  
  
in the arms of an angel  
  
fly away from here  
  
from this dark cold hotel room  
  
and the endlessness that you fear  
  
you are pulled from the wreckage  
  
of your silent reverie  
  
you're in the arms of the angel  
  
may you find some comfort there  
  
you're in the arms of the angel  
  
may you find some comfort here 


End file.
